“Ah, Fantastiman, my old friend. I see the look of surprise on your face. How could I, Ms. Tikal, know how to nullify your Pulse Wave so easily? Of course, you never suspected my alter ego, TV Anchorwoman Felicia Flaxen, that same reporter you gave the exclusive interview to, who you showed the secrets of your Pulse Wave? That’s right! And today I complete my Magnum Opus - and it was all thanks to you!”

Remember minions, the road to super-villainy is a treacherous one. If you want the world to tremble at the merest whisper of your name, for kings and presidents to cower at your feet, you’ve got a lot of work to do. Fortunately, you won’t have to go it alone. If you buy Villainy now, we’ll show you how to: hire henchmen, hatch a plot, plan a scheme, defeat Fantastiman, and finally complete your magnum opus. Still not enough? Wait! There’s more! Our handy dandy Villainy kit also provides you with a villain name generator and all the fantastic dials and power cubes every villain needs to track his progress! Once you complete our program you will have the skills, the persona, and, most of all, the power. So what are you waiting for?

~ Villainy by Numbers: Hiring a Henchman - the right tool for the wrong job. ~

When you learn how to be a villain from Villainy, we want you to succeed, and that means giving you the proper support. Other villain training programs expect you to go it alone, but we will show you how to hire the right henchmen and turn your dark dreams into reality.

Testimonial: “I was in a rut, just hanging around my secret lair all day. Then Villainy helped me hire Dr. Blake Dark and my evil schemes really took off!” - Rex Roofer

~ Meanwhile… Night in the City! ~

Once you have a good right-hand man and maybe another henchman, it’s time to start building your nefarious nihilistic legacy! Villainy gives you a complete guide to the perfect alter ego to keep your cash flowing in-between crimes. And speaking of crimes, we also give you a complete run-down on the crimes that will train you in all the skills you need for the plots and schemes ahead.

Testimonial: “I never would have known about all the advantages of posing as TV anchorwoman Felicia Flaxen if it weren’t for Villainy!” - Ms. Tikal

~ Wheels with Wheels: Hatching a Plot and Making it Pay! ~

Becoming a super-villain requires a certain something your common criminal just can’t match. You have to set yourself apart from the wretched scum around you. Villainy will show you how to become an infamous household word, shushed by mothers at dinner tables everywhere. Erect your evil statue into a monument of villainy, turn your evil theme song into the most inappropriate ringtone ever, or just design the ultimate imposing visage. These paths and more to infamy are waiting for you!

Testimonial: “Sure, I had robbed a bank or two, but it wasn’t until Villainy showed me how to dye the city’s lake red so that the Mayor really took notice. Everyone in the city turned red in their showers!” - Eye Carrumba

~ They will Fear You! Planning a scheme and rising through the ranks. ~

You’ve gotten the public’s attention and now it’s time to build on that success by committing a series of villainous acts. Every villainous act has rewards that will help you further your plans! So build a secret base, frame your opponent, or steal city hall!

Testimonial: “You should have seen the look on Fantastiman’s face when I hit him with the laser built into my private satellite. Thanks Villany!” - Allie Gator

~ At Last, We Meet! Fighting your rivals and getting ahead. ~

As you rise through the ranks of rank aggression, you’ll have to deal with more than just the police - and even that disgusting hero of the masses, Fantastiman. You also have to be on guard against your fellow villains. That’s right, it’s a villain-eat-villain world out there, and sometimes you have to take a fellow nemesis down a peg if you want to be the top villain in the city. Villainy will show you when to start a free-for-all with a rival villain and how to come out on top!

Testimonial: “When Ms. Tikal came at me with that monocle laser I thought I was done for. But thanks to the radioactive hamster bite Villainy suggested I get, I was able to win the free-for-all!” - The Craig

~ Not so Fast, Chum! How to battle Fantastiman and become notorious. ~

You’re ready to begin your magnum opus, but first you have to get rid of that annoying, cloying, too-cool for school do-gooder, crossing guard with superpowers: Fantastiman. Fighting the “Fist of Justice” might seem daunting at first, but worry not, fearsome villains! Villainy will give you all the tips and tricks you need to overcome every last one of Fantastiman’s annoyingly expansive powers, from the Gamma Ray Barrage to the Mindsnap Beam!

Testimonial: “The first time I fought Fantastiman, he threw me off the bridge with his gravity whip. Then I got Villainy and they gave me the intellect to avoid the whip and continue my attack!” - Rat Lady

~ Magnum Opus: Becoming the Top Villain. ~

It all comes down to this. You’ve plotted, schemed, battled, and now the time has come to bring the city to its knees! Will you delete the internet or decaffeinate the world’s coffee supply? So many choices, so little time. Let Villainy help you make the choice that’s right for you, right for your henchmen, and right for your budget!

Testimonial: “Villainy was essential to letting me know the four easy steps to publishing Fantastiman’s browser history to the web. Since I did, he hasn’t shown his face in the city!” - Doctor Loom

~ Disclaimer ~

The following was an advertisement for Villainy. All super-villains appearing in this advertisement were compensated for their appearances. Villainy not responsible for any acts of mayhem, plots, schemes, or free-for-alls. Villainy is a registered trademark of Mayfair Games and is intended for 2-4 villains ages 12 and up. Requires 30-minutes per player to complete the course.

Note: Article written by Chuck Rice, originally published in GTM #173.